Call the midwife kind, caring and compassionate this Christmas

Having a baby is one of life’s most joyous events, but for some women it can be over-shadowed by the grim reality of domestic abuse.

Maternity staff at Singleton Hospital share the most intimate moments in the lives of the women they care for, and are all too often aware that some new mothers are in relationships with abusive partners.

This Christmas staff wanted to do something practical to help, and decided to support Women’s Aid, an organisation established to help keep woman and children safe.

A Women’s Aid Giving Tree was set up specifically for staff on the hospital’s postnatal ward, every single tag, each representing a woman in a local refuge, was snapped up within just 45 minutes.

Members of staff who took the tags pledged to provide Christmas gifts for those affected by domestic abuse.

In a further display of altruism, members of staff who missed out on claiming a tag asked if they could buy a Christmas gift for the women anyway.

The initiative was organised by Hannah Gardner, a Swansea Bay Women's Experience Midwife.

She said: “I thought it would be nice to build a rapport with Women’s Aid as a service, because the majority of us, at some point in our careers, have supported women who've needed support with domestic abuse, or even women who've been in refuge locally.”

Hannah explained why they had chosen to concentrate on the women rather than children.

She said: “Originally, we asked if there were any children in the refuge but our contact shared how the children are often covered by numerous charities, however, the women don't always get anything to comfort them at this time of year.

“When they said that, we replied we'd really love to be able to do a gift tag tree for those women. 

“Our contact spoke to the women, who were in local refuge, and asked them for suggestions for things that they might like. And then we had an individual tag for each woman in the refuge, that we were able to put on the tree.

“They asked for really simple things - a few asked for slippers, some of them asked for fluffy slipper socks. 

“The refuge had said they weren’t sure we would be able to cover everyone, but if some of the women could be covered, that was great. They were covered straight away. 

“I put a tree up in our staffroom with tags for around 20 women - they went within 45 minutes. The staff told me, ‘We need more. They're all gone.’

“We got back in touch, and Women's Aid said we could get shared items, things like fleeces or festive treats that the women could share in the refuge. Lots of maternity staff contributed that way.”

The heart-warming display of Christmas kindness has not been lost on Hannah.

She said: “I was really proud of our staff. It was just a small idea, to bring some joy to women who are in a refuge, and the response was overwhelming - everyone wanted to get involved.

“Our staff culture is one of wanting to be with women, to be a midwife. The word midwife means ‘being with women’ and I think the response of the staff showed how much we do want to do that, and that they are willing to go above and beyond. 

“Nobody had to contribute to this. It was just a little idea but staff got really excited about it and everyone really wanted to contribute.

“I think it's because often in our careers we care for women who have needed support from domestic abuse services, and their response to this initiative reflects their deep compassion and commitment to showing women in refuge, who might feel unseen, that they are seen, valued and cared for.”

Nicola Davies (pictured left with Hannah Gardner), support assistant for Swansea’s Women’s Aid in Refuge Services, thanked the staff on behalf of the mothers.

She said: “This is amazing for us. What we find is we get charities donating presents for children while some of the mums literally have no family and nothing – their children obviously aren’t old enough to go out and buy them gifts.

“It’s so lovely that we can actually give the women, who suffer so much through their lives, something nice to open themselves on Christmas Day.

“It’s a really hard time for them. Going through all this by themselves. It’s absolutely amazing that we can say the maternity unit, who have actually cared for the women, can donate something.

“It’s an amazing gesture. It’s unbelievable how kind people can be.”

Midwife Beth Frecknall said the staff were delighted to take part in the initiative.

She said: “We spend time with these women at a really special time in their lives, and seeing how they have been affected by the situation that they are in, gives us an insight into what they go through. 

“You can’t help but feel compassionate for them – so when the opportunity came to do something nice for them, we all jumped at the chance.

“As a midwife I’ve seen the strength of these women, particularly during their childbirth journey and the love for their children, to be able to do something for them felt really special to us.”

Main pic caption: Nicola Davies (Women's Aid), Amanda Bishop (Ward Clerk), Nastaran Fathi (Midwife), Bethan Fracknell (Midwife), Caitilin Mortimore (Midwife).